Ashlee Simpson and Pete Wentz getting married? Hell, I bet Summer's Eve and Massengill are in a full on brawl right now to see who will get to sponsor this festival of douche bags. And when it comes to "a lot of speculation" about Pete and you....most of that speculation is about whether Pete Wentz is only a little gay or fruitier than Elton John's banana hammock. Hey Pete, here's a hint.....you're not supposed to be wearing more makeup than the bride! Ashlee you better get ready because Pete has put in special requests for your wedding shower gifts. You'll be getting a Clay Aiken mask and a giant strap on. Did I say that? Man, I am such a jerk because weddings are so beautiful. I can hear their vows now....Do you Douchey McDouchebag take Ass-face McLipsyncer to be your wife? Do you promise to have and to hold and to never steal her eyeliner? Hey Ashley, you wanna know why this marriage can't work? Because you don't have a penis. You've heard of Generation X....well you two belong to Generation XAC for Xtreme Ass Clowns.

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