If Oprah is interested in you, run. Lately, its become a surefire way to tell whether you might have a serious problem. First, she inflicted Tyra Banks' personality upon the world, then James Frey, then Tom Cruise.

As if the news weren't already disturbing from the TomKat camp (as though any even moderate press release from that side of the Universe could disturb the legions any more), it seems Tom Cruise is reenacting Mission Impossible at swanky gatherings in L.A. to the degree that hundres of clubs in California are seriously considering taking out additional liability insurance.

The "Mission Impossible" star "dangled off a nine-foot-high balcony" at the concert, according to the new issue of In Touch Weekly. He then complained "All these people are making me crazy. It's too much!'" and, as onlookers "gasped in disbelief" he "climbed up cables to get away from the crowds." The account adds details to a report that first appeared in the New York Post.

Cruise made it up to the VIP balcony and reportedly "went nuts" when he heard his favorite songs from West. "As Kanye sang a line from 'Gold Digger,' about the need for prenups, Tom threw his hands in the air," according to the mag, which also says that Cruise chatted with other concert-goers about Scientology. "He asked us what religion we were," a source told ITW. "He told us that Scientology changed his life and his fiancée's life, and it could change ours, too."

Sure, picking on Cruise is like poking the kid down the street who has to wear the bike helmet at all times, but at some point, we have to stop accepting bad behavior, and start mandating some kind of Cruise Relocation Program from the federal government.